Hunt or Be Hunted Episode Nine: Almost There

High Hopes Season 2: Hunt or Be Hunted, Episode Nine: Almost There

Bradley: So this is it then? *staring up* Quite-

Devra: It isn't a palace, Bradley. This place is cheap. 

Ted: Cheap, dear? I would not complain about living here. 

Devra: I would, darling. 

Bradley: This place is just...beautiful. I wish Jocelyn could see this. 

Devra: She can. Unless she's a peasant without a television. 

Ted: She is quite pleasant- oh my bad, I heard incorrectly. 

Devra: Come on, come and explore this place. 

You might enjoy it. 

Bradley: I think I will. It's rather nice here.

The weather is fresh. 

Devra: Okay, you can shush now. 

Bradley: Is she always this grumpy? 

Or she still upset about that rose? 

 Ted: That rose? We have not told you.

Bradley: Told me what? 

Devra: You do not need to tell the whole world every little detail about me, Mr Pleasanton. I am not some open book. 

Ted: You are a royal, correct? They are always-

Devra: We are not! That's what the papers say! 

Ted: As you wish. 

Bradley: So what's the drama then? The big scoop....

Devra: They let us watch the feeds. I caught who did it. 

Bradley: Who did what? Plant the rose...

Devra: Yes, indeed. 

Ted: Tell him who it was, my dear. 

Devra: I am getting there, Ted. I can't stand to think about it. 

It was her, Bradley. 

Bradley: Her? Her who? 

Devra: The host. 

Bradley: Why would she do that? That's...that's...

Devra: Extremely offensive to my crown, I know. 

How dare she? 

Ted: Devra was convinced someone truly...fancied her. 

Devra: May we head inside please? This outdoors...it is affecting my skin. 

Can you see? This is peasant air acne. 

Bradley: You seemed fine back at the less fancy house? 

Devra: Ha. I had makeup, my dear. 

Ted: They lost her makeup on the way here. 

Bradley: How have you possibly been surviving? 

Devra: Listen, newbie. I will not be tolerating you if you mess with me. 

Bradley: No need to whine. 

Ted: It's best not to argue with her, son. 

Devra: Shall we view the feeds for the past two days? 
See who will be joining us. 
Bradley: I think so, your majesty. 
Ted: Much better, Bradley. 
Bradley: Let's watch. 

 ----

*two days earlier* 

Greta: Welcome back to.....Hunt or Be Hunted, my fantastic reality show that I had no part in creating besides choosing furnishings for this house. My name is Greta Francis, your host for this evening. Tonight's episode is brought to you by Hbambaleiayo, pronounced bam-ba-lay-yo, famous for their confusing spellings and more confusing soup flavours. Silent 'h', yo.

 ----

Irma: The excitement of winning an advantage is most overwhelming, I must report this immediately back to my superiors.

*A loud beeping noise is heard followed by the sound of a phone ringing*

Inspectron Command: Hello, You have reached Inspectron Command Customer Services. Please state your business.
Irma: I am Irma Roboot, Designated Inspectron 2000. I must submit my progress to Command.
Inspectron Command: Hold on, I'll just patch you through. Proceed with your transmission Irma.

 

Irma: I have successfully completed my quiz, I am one step closer to my target.
Dr. Radium: Excellent Irma, You have made us all proud. The Board of Reality Show Directors is most pleased with your progress. This is the next step in infiltrating all of the Reality Shows on Earth. Soon, it will be the board of directors who will decide the winner. Not the public. Not the contestants. Us!

First Hunt Or Be Hunted, Next.... the world! *laughs manically*

Irma: But Doctor, I don't want to take over the world. I want to help people, I want to play the game, I want to discover how a reality show works. I must find out what happened to the others.....*BBBBBBUUUUUZZZZZ!* One is still trapped.

 Dr. Radium: Do not be silly, Irma. This is what you were programmed for! Stupid robot must be faulty again. I think it's time you had a new update. Prepare to download.
*The download is completed and Irma reboots slowly*

Dr. Radium:I just hope the boffins in the lab have worked out all the glitches and bugs in the new update. We all know what happened to the last one.

*Irma switches back on but something is drastically different, Irma's voice has changed and so has her personality, She appears to be speaking Spanish*

Irma: Hola. Mi nombre es Irmero Robooto. It is bonito to meet you!

Dr. Radium: Oh god. What have I done? I hope the Board of Directors doesn't find out about this. *end transmission*
Irma: I cannot wait to communicate with my amigos in the la casa. Let the programa de juegos commence.

 ----

Clyde: It feels very lonely with only the three of us here. 

Marsha: Moi deesnt mind. Mo' moniees for moi! 

Clyde: That isn't how this competition works, Marsha. 

Marsha: End? Moi deesn't karre. Here to ween! 

Clyde: I do have faith in you, I suppose. 

You should win. 

Marsha: Oi tank ewe! Moi dieserfs it. 

Dent I? 

Clyde: That is yours to answer, I am afraid. 

Do you think you 'dieserfs' it? Marsha? 

Marsha: *makes splashing sound* 

Clyde: Wait a minute....Marsha!  

Marsha: *has dived in, bare naked* 

Clyde: Marsha! What are you doing over there? 

Marsha! 

Marsha: *spitting water* Ugh, moi is nekked. Au neutral, boi! 

Clyde: I can...barely see that. 

Clyde: I didn't think...I didn't know you were that...type. 

Marsha? 

Marsha: Moi eesn't a toipe. She ees spree giftend; a lengendary mastier! 

Clyde: I do not even know what you just said. Marsha? 

Marsha: Moi ees no tipe. 

Clyde: *whispering* Thank god for censoring. 

Nobody wants to see her naked-

Marsha: Oi! 'Lyde, wheat ewe say to moi? 

Clyde: Sweet nothings. Just a prayer. 

Marsha: Moi never prayers. Non. 

Clyde: Your parents didn't teach you to pray from an early age? 

Marsha: Moi's peerants deed not. 

Clyde: That's unfortunate for you, then. 

Marsha: Moi dees not thank soh. Never kneed to prayer. 

Clyde: Pray. Pray can help you, Marsha. This topic came from the bizarre, but I am glad to know more about you Marsha. Thank you. 

Marsha: Doo nit tank moi. Tank 'oorself. 

Clyde: By praying? 

Irma: Hola hombres. Este es un tiempo maravilloso.

Marsha: Ees that ewe, Ermah? 

Irma: Sí lo es. 

Clyde: Come and sit down, Irma.  

Irma: Yo no sé mucho.

Clyde: I can't understand Spanish much anymore, but as a teacher, I learn to understand and adapt more frequently. You...you cannot...what? 

Irma: Clyde, se ha producido un error. Una actualización.

Clyde: Error? Actualization?

Marsha: Ewe mist leesin to 'er. She ees speking Spaneesh. 

Clyde: I know that, Marsha. Please...get dressed. 

Irma: Mi jefe es cruel. Él necesita parar.

Clyde: Cruel? Who is cruel?  

 

Irma: No me gustan las mujeres desnudas.

Marsha: Fein, moi will poot cloths een. 

Clyde: Thank you very much, Marsha! You scared Irma. 

Marsha: Betteir? Moi feelt soh freh outside teh confinns of clotheen! 

Clyde: Nobody else felt free, my dear. We are all happier to see you clothed. 

Marsha: O-keh ten! 

Clyde: Well, now that you are dressed, how about we head inside soon for dinner? 

Irma: *singing* Le sangrar para mí? Lamer mis labios como me necesitabas?

¿Me fijado en un sofá? Con los dedos en la boca?

Clyde: What are you singing, Irma?  

Irma: *singing* Te ves tan fresco cuando me está leyendo. 

 Vamos a causar un pequeño problema.

Marsha: Moi ees hungreh! Leets 'ave dinier. 

Clyde: Sure, let's head inside then. What food is left? 

Marsha: Moi do net no. 

Irma: *singing* Y tengo mi mente, hice esta vez.

Clyde: Let's eat. I am starving and we need to be prepared for the challenge tomorrow. Irma? 
Irma: Si?
Marsha: Luttuce eet. 

 -----

Clyde: All ready for bed time. 

Challenge tomorrow. Maybe I can convince Marsha to pray with me? 

Hmm...

Greta: I wouldn't count on it. 

Clyde: Maybe she'll surprise you, hostess. 

Irma: Siento que ese juguete astronauta de la historia del juguete de tres.

Clyde: Is that you out there, Irma? What are you saying? 

Irma: ¿No puedes entenderme? 

Clyde: I don't know what you are saying. 

I miss the English-speaking Irma. 

 Greta: Don't we all. 

Irma: ¿No tenemos todos.

Clyde: Well, I'm heading to bed unless Marsha comes in. 

I would wait up for her, but she can be a bit...well, slow. 

Only sometimes.  

Irma: Buenas noches, Clyde. 

Clyde: I want to assume you are wishing me to sleep well.

Irma: Se podría ser algo correcto, señor.

Greta: When will you speak English again? 

Irma: Cuando duermo, van a pinchar en mi cerebro artificial.

Greta: I'll pretend I understand that spiel. 

Irma: Yo sé que aprendió extensa español, joven Greta.

Greta: So I am ashamed of that fact. Shush. 

*Marsha Marshall enters* 

Marsha: Hole-a, moi's late-ino freend. 

Irma: Es que usted, amante de la moda raro?

Marsha: Moi ees feeleen deep.  

Irma: ¿Qué está mal?

Marsha: Moi is itchiah! Stoopid buggies out in doors. 

Greta: Yeah, you were the one to forget to spray yourself. 

Marsha: Shushie. 

Irma: *singing* Puedo ver lo que está pasando.
Y ellos no tienen ni idea.

 Marsha: Kanne ewe not seeng pweese? 

Irma: Tantas cosas que le dicen.
Pero la forma de hacerla entrar en.

Marsha: Goodnit, Earma. Sweep night. 

Greta: Goodnight, Marsha. See you in the morning for the challenge. 

Marsha: Doo nit reemine moi. 

Irma: Nos vemos en la mañana, mundo malvado.
Voy a dejar de dichos planes.

Greta: What planes? There aren't any planes here. 

Irma: No planos. Planes. El jefe hombre está planeando cosas.

-----

*The next morning* 

Greta: Good morning, housemates! Good morning world! 

Today, the final remaining contestants in Round One will face the final challenge before Round Two. Today's challenge needs not much explanation at all. 

Greta: Today's challenge is....Majority Rules! A favourite from Season One. 

The contestants will need to answer within the majority in order to successfully earn a point towards winning a remaining spot in the second round. There are seven questions in today's challenge. 

Bart: The contestants are ready, Greta. 

Greta: Bring them in. 

Greta: Irma! I trust they prodded at your brain last night, correct? 

Irma: Si. I am better now. My English has returned. 

Greta: That is good to hear, then. Your hair is looking wonderful recently. 

Irma: Thank you, Miss Francis. 

 Greta: Welcome to today's challenge, Clyde! How did you sleep?

Clyde: Better than most nights, surprisingly. I suppose no one really woke me. 

Greta: That's wonderful then. 

Clyde: I think so. 

Greta: Marsha Marshall! At it again with the fashion trends! 

Marsha: Prod-uction sint moi this. Tu leek it? 

Greta: I think it definitely suits you. Sure. 

Marsha: Moi ees ready for toddie. 

Greta: Okay, time for the challenge. Question One is.....

 Which contestant is most likely to fail a subject at school?

Irma: *buzz* I do know this. 

Greta: Wait. The options are: Irma, Bradley or Marsha? 

Clyde: Darn! 

Greta: As Clyde said, 'Darn'. He incorrectly answered Question One. 

Moving onto Question Two: Which contestant is least likely to win a beauty pageant? TJ or Clyde? 

Marsha: Ugleh 'Lyde! Non offensh. 

Clyde: It is true. I would not win a pageant. 

Greta: You all correctly scored within the majority for Question Two. Well done to the three of you. Irma and Marsha are leading.

Irma: Go me. I will win this challenge. 

Marsha: Non, moi 'ill.   

.

.

.

Greta: The results of Question Six show that Marsha failed at locating the majority answer for that question. Irma is leading with six points, while Clyde is in second place. It is close. 

Irma: I have not failed a question yet. I will win. 

Clyde: I can keep going. I only need this last question to place second. 

Greta: The final question is.....Which contestant from the previous season would most likely win Hunt or Be Hunted?

Lacey or Emerson? 

Clyde: Oh come on! I didn't watch it. 

Marsha: Moi deed. Go Laceh! Woop! 

.

.

.

 

Greta: Unfortunately, Clyde voted for the minority answer, Emerson. 

Well done Irma and Marsha. Good job to Irma, who scored a perfect score of seven out of seven. 

Irma: Does that mean? It means....I can be free! 

Clyde: Not entirely, Irma. Just safe.

Irma: Safe is free. 

Greta: Two of you will be moving forward in this competition. 

That means only one of you will be saying goodbye. 

Marsha: Not moi. Moi ees alweighs 'afe. 

Clyde: I couldn't possibly go today. I worked very hard. 

Greta: I can reveal one who will be moving on now....

Irma: Hmm....who could it possibly be? 

Marsha: *praying* Pweese bee moi. Plese. 

Greta: It is.....

Greta: Irma, of course! Her towel item did not affect her position, as she had already scored first in this challenge. Congrats, Irma! 

Irma: Woo! I did it! Are you proud of me now, Roboot family? 

I am about to win this competition. 

Greta: Calm down. You still need to beat four others in Round Two. 

 Irma: Oh I will beat them. Si.

Greta: Okay, calm down there. Robot. That means that Clyde and Marsha are competing for the final spot in Round 2. Who will earn that spot? 

Marsha: Moi. 

Clyde: No, moi. 

Marsha: Moi canne su ewe for that! 

-----

Marsha: Moi knews she can wine thees. 

Moi ees confidante. Eef onleh moi head meestickel prowess. 

Eef only moi canne ween now. 

*singing* No do taaigur, when yu're pussycat man, no dew dat...

----

Clyde: I am here for my daughter and I will win for her. 

I must admit, the competition is tough for round two, but I can prevail. 

I will prevail for her. This money will help her for her future studies. Don't you worry, Abigail, I will bring home cash.

Bring it on, all or nothing. 

----

 

Irma: I cannot believe I am moving to the Round of the Two. 

I will be putting forward every shoe that I can find and I will do what the humans call, 'literally winning at life'. I will follow the footsteps of that one man on lunar place. 'One small step for robot, one big step for robot-kind. 

-----

Marsha: 'Lyde! 'Lyde! Oi, 'ittle boi. 

We knead to tork. Pwease. 

Clyde: I'm going to sit down on the couch. Join us, won't you? 

Marsha: Okeh then! Ees roboot 'dere? 

Clyde: She is. 

Marsha: Meh laiks to win. Eww, you shood queet now. 

Clyde: I won't be leaving here without a fight. 

Marsha: Moi laiks to ween. Don't tack that aweh from moi. 

Irma: Enough arguing, both of you. Be happy you made it here.

Greta: Hello contestants! It is time to reveal which contestant will be joining Ted, Devra, Bradley and Irma in the second round of our competition. 

Irma: Good luck to the both of you. 

Greta: Yes, good luck to them both. The contestant is...

 

Greta: Clyde Stoners! Well done. 

Clyde: I....I cannot believe it. I passed to the next round? 

How? I was so sure...so sure Marsha would.

I...

Greta: It was very close. So close in fact that only one factor gave you the advantage. 

Marsha: Eet cannot bey! Moi deedn't loose! 

Greta: Sadly, since Irma was targeting you and she moved to the next round, you technically would be eliminated. However, had you broken the tie between you and Clyde, you may have succeeded in moving to Round 2. That tie...that was the reason you are leaving us.

Marsha: Eet is fein. Moi canne moo-ve on. Yesh. 

Irma: You enjoy the rest of your life, Marsha. 

Marsha: Moi 'ill. Ewe too. Don forgeet 'bout moi. 

Ween these for teh girlie whirls! Wooie! 

Irma: I will win this, my friend. If I can call you that?  

Marsha: (to Irma) You canne. (to Clyde) Teh manne who beat moi from the ween. How 'air ewe? 

Clyde: My apologies, Marsha. You played a wonderful game, and I wish you could continue. I would offer you a spot if I could.

Marsha: Non, ewe wouldeen't. You onleh care 'bout the self. 

Clyde: I am going to miss you, Marsha.

Irma: We will all miss you. Even the ones who 'hate' on you. 

They will miss you, because they cannot hate on you any longer. 

Clyde: I hope for the best in your life, Marsha. 

Marsha: Laik moi's mamma always 'aid, 'No do tigur when yu're pussycat.' 

That ees mie leaf goal. Never doo-een tigur. Moi ees pussycat. 

Irma: You are the most wonderful pussycat. You are special. 

Brave. Fashionable. Beautiful. Bold. 

Marsha: Moi ees bowled. 

Greta: Thank you for participating in this competition, Marsha Marshall. 

I've enjoyed your obnoxious voice and speech impediment. I haven't enjoyed the strangeness. 

Marsha: Moi ees sayin' gwoodbie now. 

Moi 'ill mees this home. 

Greta: I hope to see you return for the finale. To hear your lovely voice again. 

Marsha: No do tigur when yu're pussycat. 

CAT! 

Greta: I assume those are your final words. Cat? 

Marsha: Yeesh. Cat. Cat, catty. Cat, cat, cat. 

Greta: Do you own a cat by any chance?

Marsha: Non. Moi owes no cat! Moi wood loorve a cat! 

Greta: Maybe you should consider adopting one? It would provide you some comfort after this show. I suggest it. 

Marsha: Moi needs anotter comfourt now! 

Greta: The hot tub? 

Marsha: Yeesh. The hawt tube. 

Moi likey. Moi likey. 

Greta: You enjoy the hot tub, but soon you must be leaving us. I hope the rest of your successful life is as exciting as this show has been. 

Marsha: Moi tanks soh. Adoopteen a kitteh? 

Irma: Are you ready to leave this house for somewhere new? 

I am excited for this second round. Something fun and new. 

Clyde: I am. I've never felt more excited. No, I have. The birth of my daughter. 

But, this year, this has been most exciting. 

Irma: I agree. Shall we pack to leave? 

Greta: Irma and Clyde, it is now time to prepare yourself to leave. You will be joining the others in the midway house shortly, and then, from there, you will be leaving for the Round Two tower. A tower beyond happiness. Beyond colour.

A tower filled with betrayal.  

Clyde: It must be time now, I suppose. We packed most of our stuff this morning. Only the last stuff now.

Irma: Yes. Then, we can leave this place behind. Forge our next chapter in that tower she talks about. 

Clyde: Off we go, Irma.

 

Marsha: Cowurdz... Yeahr, dat will teech 'em.

Greta: Thank you for competing, Marsha. It is time for you to officially leave us. 

Marsha: Ok-eh. Moi ees redee. Goodbuy, Hunnte or Bee Hunteed. 

-----

*present day*

*the doorbell sounds* 

Bradley: They are here! The door is open! 

Devra: The final two contestants to join us! So glad the bore is not here. 

Ted: Marsha was- no, is, a wonderful woman. You shouldn't be so cruel to her.  

Bradley: Shall we go greet them?  

Irma: We have arrived! It is so very wonderful. This home, of course. 

Clyde: Just being here. I love it. I love the feeling. 

Irma: Oh, of course. The feeling is pure! 

I miss Marsha already. 

Bradley: Well, if it wasn't meant to be, it wasn't right. 

She proved her family proud. 

Ted: We will all miss her, but she is out. She fought so very hard. 

Devra: She was my fiercest competition. A princess against her; the peasant. 

Ted: Welcome to this house! It's so very nice to see you both. 

Irma and Clyde. We can show the tour soon. 

Irma: No rush. We only want to be happy to be here. 

Clyde: It's so very lush. Much nicer than that previous house. 

Ted: I think I preferred the other house. Much less crowded with an abundance of useless and mere rich items. I am so confused here. 

Bradley: This is the house we should have been living in. More privacy. 

More luxury. 

 Irma: Marsha would have liked it here.

Clyde: I think it's too dull for her. Not enough bright colours and outstanding shades of pink and orange. It's all very white. 

Devra: Sleek, darlings. 

Irma: Devra! You look stunning as always. 

Devra: I am surprised the robot knows exactly how beautiful this princess is. 

Bradley: No need to brag, Devra. You aren't the most beautiful girl in the world. No, you aren't. 

Devra: Right. That spot would be taken by the super gorgeous Jocelyn. 

Ted: I no longer feel in the mood for this chat. A tour, shall we? 

Clyde: I think so. All this talk on previous contestants is bringing back feelings. 

Devra: You show them around, Ted and Bradley. I am feeling in the mood to tickle the piano keys. 

Bradley: Okay, Devra. We'll show them around. This way. 

Irma: What fantastic piano playing! 

Ted: On your right, you will see the stairs to the second floor....

_______________________________________

That concludes Round One of Hunt or Be Hunted. I'd like to thank Tip, ArrowJoy, The Singing Simmer, Yannik and Vul for submitting sims that could not make it to the second round. You were all fantastic! 

Sadly, Marsha/Vul landed in an unfortunate position. I hope that you, Vul, will return next season, which is sure to be exciting.  

I wish the best of luck to Turner, Lo, Alleen, Twiddle and Penguin going into the second round. Only one can win. Good luck to the five of you. 

This is Tiger, signing out. Tune in next time.